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Turned Down

If you’re thinking of giving this to him It won’t tell him he’s broken, and it won’t tell him what to do about you.

It’s written so it can be handed over without landing as an accusation.

Buy it as a gift, $5.99

Kindle on AmazonRead chapter 7 free

EPUB and PDF, sent to your email by Gumroad.

Ebook, $5.99. Out now. By Ben Calder.

Cover of Turned Down by Ben Calder
The first page of chapter 1 on a phone

It’s a reasonable thing to do.

Turned Down is for men in long relationships who feel more like roommates than they would say out loud.

It doesn’t tell him he’s broken. It doesn’t tell him what to do about you. It works on the part that’s his.

Ink drawing of two cups on a small table by a window at dusk

What he’ll read

  1. 04Why he misreads you on the days he’s braced for a no.Chapter 4
  2. 05What his flinch is, and why you can see it.Chapter 5
  3. 06Why going quiet felt considerate to him, and isn’t.Chapter 6
  4. 07What the three seconds after a no do to both of you.Chapter 7
  5. 12Why how you talk about it counts for more than how often.Chapter 12
  6. 13How he can turn toward you without disappearing himself.Chapter 13

Read it before you give it.

Chapter 7 is free, so you can see how the book talks to him.

  • EPUB and PDF, for any phone, tablet or e-reader
  • Sent straight to your inbox
  • Unsubscribe with one click, any time

We’ll send chapter 7 and news about the book. How we handle your address.

Ink drawing of a man who has stopped, with three fading outlines of himself behind him

How the gift works

  1. 1

    Choose Buy it as a gift on this page.

  2. 2

    Add his email address and a message, if you want one.

  3. 3

    He gets the book by email.

Questions

How does the gift work?

When you buy it here, you can mark it as a gift and add a message. He gets the book by email.

Can I read it first?

Yes. Chapter 7 is free, so you can see how it talks to him before you give it.

Does it take sides?

It’s written to him, because it’s his part it can do something about. It doesn’t make you the problem.

What if there is pressure, control or violence?

Then this is the wrong book, and what you need is a person, not a paperback.

Cover of Turned Down by Ben Calder

Turned Down

For Men Who Feel Unwanted in Their Marriage and Are Tired of Being the One Who Asks

It arrives in his inbox. Nothing to wrap.

Ben Calder · Ebook, $5.99. Out now.

Buy it as a gift, $5.99

Kindle on AmazonRead chapter 7 free

EPUB and PDF, sent to your email by Gumroad.

If there is coercion, violence or control in your relationship, in either direction, this is the wrong book. What you need is a person, not a paperback.